Court Sanctioned Kidnapping via Family Court: Happy Birthday Zachary
Today, the only “mask” I wear (pretending to be stronger than I really am in regards to the abrupt loss of my eight children) is partially falling off. I hurt today. I work hard to create compartments so I don't feel the massive psychic shock of the loss of my children every day. I feel as though some of the compartments are crumbling. I acknowledge that RAW PAIN is okay. I continue to trust the journey, even when I don't understand. I realize I AM NOT ALONE in this journey, as millions of protective mothers around the world have also suffered the horror of maternal alienation from losing custody of their babies and children via the family court system.
TODAY, July 13th, is my youngest child's 22nd birthday. I lost custody
of Zachary when he was a nursing infant. He was my eighth child.
Zachary was abruptly removed from me after a temporary custody hearing in March 1996 when he was 6 months old. I have not been allowed to see my son, Zachary and my minor children, since 1998 due to seeking safety and a divorce from my abusive husband, Mr. Marty Warner.
Since 1998 I have lived under an address protection program from my ex-husband, my children's father, for my safety. I did see my son, Zachary, at a football game in 2003, when he was 8 years old, but I did not approach him as I had no right to talk to him per court orders. My older son, Joshua, who was 16 years old at the time, did approach me and hugged me
Zachary Warner, 18 years old, 2013
As punishment for contact with my 16 year old son, Joshua, I was served with contempt papers, sued and threatened with jail time. My ex-husband has legally stalked me for nearly 20 years - 45 court hearings to date. Today, I want emancipated from my abuser, Marty Warner - Zachary's father.
While many people focus their outrage on the judicial system alone, it’s easy to lose sight of broader problems that assist in the culture of abuse—like churches, pastors, family members and the local community. These elements, too, played a role in the corruption and silence that has allowed a man like my ex-husband, and others like him, to operate untouched for so long.
Most individuals prefer not to hear the story of how a cultured people turned a blind eye to consenting to the "court sanctioned kidnapping of children through America's family courts" and how the majority of our society, consisting of cultured people, remained silent.
Many women grow up in homes in which they were conditioned and groomed to be victims. They marry sociopathic abusers, have children with them, and lose custody and/or contact of their children when they become stronger and break away.
Losing permanent custody and visitation of your children feels like being doused in oil and set on fire. Healing is slow and difficult. The pain never goes away. One doctor describes removing a nursing infant from a mother similar to castrating a man.
In 1999, the Court, due to the request of ex-husband and his attorney, increased my child support obligations (double than what I earn as a disabled woman) and signed a court order denying me visitation privileges with my minor children FOR THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILDREN. I was unaware of the court hearing as I was not notified. Of the forty-two court hearings I have attended due to my divorce in 1996, three court related hearings occurred without notification.
How could living with an abusive man---the children’s father---who dragged his family through eight oppressive cults, who routinely beat his children with his fists, logs, fraternity boards and belts, and beat and raped and impregnated their mother during her breakdown/stroke in 1993-1994, who left their mother [me] at the Wings of Love half way house, Killingsworth, Portland, Oregon, during the time of her illness in 1994, denied her medical care, and who hid crimes of child molestation and rape that occurred repeatedly in own household---BE IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILDREN?
In December 2003, I was ordered by Oregon Circuit Court Judge Paula Brownhill, to have no further contact with my minor children - no letters, no gifts, no phone calls or messages through a third party to any of my minor children. I obeyed the Court order, and gave away my children's Christmas gifts.
I have no history of alcohol, drug or child abuse. I have no criminal record. I often used my body to protect my children from violence from their father, even when I was pregnant. My children have erased me from their life. Many of them (professed Christians) have written me 'hate' letters. Christian pastors, elders, church members and Christian school teachers have supported my abuser - my ex-husband, and have taught my children to 'hate' me, their mother. My children have been told that I am "evil, wicked and immoral" because I divorced my children's father.
When my children are adults and ask me what I did to help them, I will tell them, “I spoke the truth.” When they ask me why my case remained unchallenged, I hope I don’t have to tell them, “Nobody cared.”
No matter what the court had decided, I put the beautiful memories I had of my children in a sacred place. Each one of my children had shown me a new and beautiful universe through his/her eyes. As a mother, each day was a journey of new experiences and new joys. I am still in awe in the gift of motherhood and am grateful for the days, months, and years I shared with each one of my children.
There are not always two sides to every story. Our determination to pursue truth by setting up a fight between two sides leads us to assume that every issue has two sides--no more, no less. But if you always assume there must be an 'other side' you may end up scouring the margins of science or the fringes of lunacy to find it. This explains, in part, the bizarre phenomenon of Holocaust denial, among other denials, and that river flows through lots of courtrooms.
I have many memories of my son, Zachary's, BIRTH DAY – both beautiful and highly traumatic. I was blessed to meet my newborn son. I also knew the months ahead would be horrific, as I planned to seek safety from my abusive husband of nearly 20 years.
Preceding the birth of my 8th child, my older son had violently pushed me, and I went into labor. I was hemorrhaging severely before arriving at the hospital. My trusted physician proceeded to care for me, but my husband did not want the doctor to save my life. My physician threatened my husband that they would have him removed from the hospital if he continued to interfere. My husband wanted my baby saved, though. (He was a pro-life advocate, but treated me, the mother, inhumanely.) I did not want my husband with me at the hospital, but had no choice. I was in the hospital for 3 days, on IV Pitocin to help slow down the hemorrhaging. My baby, Zachary, was healthy and we enjoyed bonding.
In the months that followed, the abuse and threats from my husband and his Christian cult supporters escalated as I would not submit to his abuse, go to his Christian cult meetings or submit to the abuse from his Christian cult counselor, Baptist Pastor Bill Heard of Roseburg, Oregon and his wife, Linda Heard. My husband and Pastor Heard threatened me because I shared that I was going report the crimes that my children and I had suffered. They wanted the crimes of D.V., rape and child abuse/rape to be a "family and church secret."
I did what was right, reported the crimes and sought safety. I lost my children.
I went to Oregon's judicial system for help and was not prepared for the horrors I experienced within our legal system. I found a system which treated me as deplorably as my former husband and his religious supporters. I have extensive documentation, including affidavits, court transcripts, tapes and videos, medical and mental reports, and witnesses to substantiate and elaborate on this story. I believe that when this case comes to light, someone will have to answer for the abuse and silent violence I have suffered in the Polk, Marion, and Wasco County courts.
Marital and ritual abuse evolved into legal abuse.
When I sought safety for my children and myself in January 1996, the Court allowed me to live in hiding with my young children prior to the court hearings, due to the testimony and affidavits of numerous witnesses. I retained an attorney and reported the crimes that had been committed against my children and me.
On March 10, 1996, I was forced, by an Order of the Court, and by my ex-husband, Marty Warner, his attorney, his family and religious supporters, to do something that raged against my good conscience, my common sense and against all my motherly instincts. After a temporary custody hearing, a Court Order signed by Judge Albin Norblad forcibly removed my nursing baby and two youngest children from me. I obeyed the Court Order and gave my children over to my ex-husband. I drove to the hospital, rented a breast-pump and later collapsed and went into shock. I could not understand what had happened and why. I have not yet recovered from the shock; perhaps I never will....
Coral Anika Theill, with her newborn son and eighth child, Zachary David Warner, July 1995, Independence, Oregon
The price for my own safety and freedom in 1996 was an imposed, unnatural and unwanted separation from my eight children. The injustice committed against me is not just the physical separation from my children, but the willful desecration of the mother-child relationship and bond, a sacred spiritual and emotional entity.
Photo: My son, Zachary and me, April 1996, the month after I lost custody of all of my eight children. It was beyond "obscene" to participate in "court ordered visitation weekends" after being a 24/7 nurturing, loving mother for 20 years. My ex-husband's mother, Helen Warner, was "put in charge" as a surrogate mother. She hated me. Her past history with her own 8 children involved several of them being molested and raped in her own care for years. While she cared for my children, my children were also raped. I passed six psychological exams in preparation for the child custody hearings in March 1996. My ex husband failed his court ordered psychological exam. Helen Warner did not have to go through any psyche exam. I reported the crimes to the authorities and lost custody of my children.
Two hundred years ago a system of legal slavery allowed for the ownership of human beings as if they were livestock. Children were ripped away from their mothers with as little consideration as separating a calf from a cow. In this country today, extreme forms of paternalistic religion promote an institutional form of slavery where a woman must be totally obedient to a husband who has absolute control of her life. The wife’s lot is to obey and bear children. If she rebels and chooses to save herself by escaping from this life, the father—supported by the church community and often by the court system, can forcibly strip a child away from the mother.
Although my children have erased me from their life, I am not dead, I am very much alive, and I have a face, and a name.
I have been and will always be very involved in their life, even if it is only through prayer. I am praying that someday my children will choose to become "aware, awake and conscious" concerning details of their past and present. Their lack of awareness regarding their own life will greatly affect those around him. I pray my children will find good role models and mentors. I also pray that someday my children find the courage to walk through the unpleasant details of their past.
Many of the Christians my children have chosen to socialize and worship with, embrace and support their father, Mr. Marty Warner, Independence, Oregon, a man who has committed criminal acts against his former wife and children. In short, these pastors, Bridgeport Community Church members, elders and Christians CONDONE crimes against children and women.
This does not support my children's well-being, only their delusion of themselves and their family.
Coral Anika Theill's eight children with their father,
Marty Warner (my abusive ex-husband)
From L to R
Zachary Warner, Hannah [Warner] Hart, Rebekah Warner, Joshua Warner, Marty Warner, Theresa [Warner] Arnold, Aaron Warner, Rachel [Warner] White, Sarah [Warner] Bobeda
You will never know where you are going unless you truly understand where you came from. It is important to take care of the "contamination of the past."
I will continue to share my truths in a legal and "non violent" manner. Non-violence does not threaten. Non-violence "leans" until something, someday "moves."
I believe in seeking to defeat injustice, not people.
I believe that the Universe is on the side of "justice" and that right will prevail.
L to R: Coral with her children - Zachary, Hannah & Rebekah Warner, Corvallis, Oregon 1998. Due to abuse, assaults and threats while participating in "court ordered visitation," I legally changed my name and entered a state address protection program in 1999.
Things are not getting worse, they are getting uncovered. We must hold each other tight and continue to pull back the veil.
For nothing is hidden, except to be revealed; nor has anything been secret, but that it would come to light. - Mark 4: 22 (NASB)
I hope by sharing my story, the consciousness and awareness of society will be raised and the quality of life will improve in America. As a mother, I long for a safe and healthy society for my children to grow up in.
I continue to envision a society that resonates compassion, unconditional love, peace and non-judgment to one another. I continue to believe in imminent possibilities, miracles, surprises and ONE FINE DAY!
*This is a letter I wrote my son for his 18th birthday 2 years ago. I sent the letter, as well as gifts and photos via registered mail as well as gifts and pictures of Zachary and me. I am not sure he received his letter and gifts. I did not receive a reply. My son lives with his father, my ex-husband.
July 9, 2013
Wishing you a happy 18th birthday! I wanted you to know I was thinking of you, especially today. I remember the day you were born like it was yesterday. You were and always will be a precious “gift.” I hope this year brings you many wonderful memories and experiences.
Every day, every year, every holiday I have thought about you. Even though I have not been allowed to see you or be a part of your life, no one can take away the fact that you are my son. I love you and continue to pray for your highest good.
I hope my contacting you does not upset or disturb you. That is not my intention. I understand that your brothers and sisters do not wish any contact with me. I do not know how you feel.
Since 2003, I have not been allowed to write you or send you gifts. You were only eight years old at that time. Your father and his attorneys have spent a lot of time and energy the past 18 years to make sure I was not allowed in your life.
I wrote my memoir, BONSHEÁ Making Light of the Dark, this year and dedicated it to you and your brothers and sisters. My book was published March 2013. I hope if you ever feel led to read it, it will provide answers as to why I was not in your life. In my memoir, I included many affidavits and court documents that may answer some of your questions. Your father was ordered by the Court judge in December 2003 to make sure that you and your brothers and sisters received professional counseling in regards to your parent’s divorce.
I hope someday, when the time is right for you, that you will have the opportunity to speak with a professional counselor – someone who is not a part of your family, church or school community - in regards to your past and present family history.
The day you were removed and taken from me physically, you were only six months old. March 10, 1996 was one of the most traumatic days of my life.
I wrote in my published book and memoir:
"On March 10, 1996, I was forced, by an Order of the Court, and by my ex-husband, his attorney, his family and religious supporters, to do something that raged against my good conscience, my common sense and against all my motherly instincts. After a temporary custody hearing, a Court Order signed by Judge Norblad forcibly removed my nursing baby and two youngest children from me. I obeyed the Court Order and gave my children over to my ex-husband. I drove to the hospital, rented a breast-pump and later collapsed and went into shock. I could not understand what had happened and why. I have not yet recovered from the shock; perhaps I never will....”
I hope to visit Oregon someday soon. If you would like to meet sometime or if you want me to call you, please let me know. *UPDATE: I traveled to Oregon in September 2016. I left my phone number, email and gifts for my children at the office of my son, Joshua Warner, Corban University, Salem, Oregon. Not ONE of my children contacted me.
If you ever wish to speak with or meet my friend Judy Bennett, she would be happy to speak with you. Judy lives close to you in Monmouth, Oregon. Judy and her husband met you when you were a baby.
Her address and phone is:
____________, _________, Oregon Phone number is: ( ) ___________
I love you and have missed you more than words can describe.
Hope this year is your best year ever!
“Coral Anika Theill”
OPEN LETTER: Alienated & Erased Protective Mother Shares Her Story with Kalie Cannon - The Handmaiden's Tale
About the Author: Coral Anika Theill's published works address abuse and trauma recovery and most recently, wounded Marines and Montford Point Marines. Her writings have encouraged and inspired numerous trauma victims and wounded Marines and service members recovering from PTS and TBI. Coral's positive insights as a survivor have also earned the respect of clinical therapists, advocates, professors and authors.
BONSHEÁ Making Light of the Dark has been used as a college text for nursing students at Linfield College, Portland, Oregon. In July 2011 Coral received the Lester Granger Award from the National Montford Point Marine Association. In 2002 she received a Writer's Award from iUniverse Publishing Co. She is also a contributing writer for Leatherneck Magazine and Short Rations for Marines. Her October 2011 Leatherneck Magazine article, "Invisible Battle Scars: Confronting the Stigma Associated with PTS & TBI," is cited in the U.S. Army War College "Psychological Health Notes."
Ms. Theill is a survivor of childhood sex trafficking, molestation and abuse, rape, domestic violence, marital rape, spiritual abuse, and nearly twenty years of “legal stalking” and judicial injustice. Before her marriage, she was co-valedictorian of her high school class, completed pilot training and ground school (age 17) and worked as a court reporter and legal secretary. She survived twenty years of domestic violence and now lives under a “state address protection program” from her former husband, Marty Warner of Independence, Oregon. www.coralanikatheill.com