Therapist Abuse, Exploitation, Breech of Client Confidentiality
Attempted Murder Condoned by Veteran's Administration Employees
Keeping secrets binds up our energy and impacts our health and well-being. The freedom that I gained when I broke my silence about the abuse I suffered from Mr. George Amiotte and Dr. Charles Kuttner I wouldn’t trade for anything. My voice is more important to me than my safety. Once secrets are exposed to the light, they lose their power over you.
Therapist exploitation and abuse far outweighs the crimes committed against me due to the fragile element of trust I struggled to build again.
There are not always two sides to every story. Our determination to pursue truth by setting up a fight between two sides leads us to assume that every issue has two sides--no more, no less. But if you always assume there must be an 'other may end up scouring the margins of science or the fringes of lunacy to find it. This explains, in part, the bizarre phenomenon of Holocaust denial, among other denials, and that river flows through lots of courtrooms.
In 1998, my physician, Dr. Charles Kuttner, asked me a profound question during our last therapy session. He asked me to share with him why I had spent twenty years of my life with my abusive ex-husband. He asked me why I had not sought help sooner and why I had protected my abusers throughout my childhood and my adult life. I could not articulate the words he was asking me to express in his office. I can now. I found my voice. In short, abuse dulls our senses and instills fear. We lose our voice and identity long before it has had a chance to form. My “protectors” never showed up as a child. As an adult, those who I went to for help, did not show up either, including Dr. Charles H. Kuttner. Dr. Kuttner only needed to look in the mirror for the answer to his question. Within one year I would report the abuse and threats I suffered from his friend, George Amiotte. Dr. Kuttner would dismiss my cries for help and embrace my abuser.
In 1998, my physician, Dr. Charles Kuttner, asked me a profound question during our last therapy session. He asked me to share with him why I had spent twenty years of my life with my abusive ex- husband. He asked me why I had not sought help sooner and why I had protected my abusers throughout my childhood and my adult life. I could not articulate the words he was asking me to express in his office. I can now. I found my voice. In short, abuse dulls our senses and instills fear. We lose our voice and identity long before it has had a chance to form. My “protectors” never showed up as a child. As an adult, those who I went to for help, did not show up either, including Dr. Charles Kuttner. Dr. Kuttner only needed to look in the mirror for the answer to his question. Within one year I would report the abuse and threats I suffered from his friend, George Amiotte. Dr. Kuttner would dismiss my cries for help and embrace my abuser.
Dr. Charles Kuttner, Portland, Oregon
*Read Coral Anika Theill's 2013 published memoir, BONSHEA Making Light of the Dark
and her documented account of Therapist Abuse & Exploitation by Dr. Kuttner & Mr. Amiotte on pages 219-243.
The balancing act of trusting your own boundaries and recognizing where people are in their development is a continual lesson in life. I always see the potential in people rather than seeing who they are being in the present moment. As we journey with people, they will show us who they are. Today, when people show me who they are, I BELIEVE THEM. As I look back at all the negative experiences, as well as the cruel and abusive people that showed up in my life, I am reminded of the severity of my past. I believe the amount of abuse a person is subjected to will be similar to the amount of predators, perpetrators and energetic vampires who will show up as "teachers." Each person was a mirror to the past torture I had experienced. They were each a unique gift - allowing me to see the depth of abuse of my past and help me realize that I NO LONGER ACCEPT ANY ABUSE OR DISRESPECT FROM ANYONE - NO MATTER WHAT.
I found my voice in the courtroom, I found my voice by standing up to abusive therapists and advocates, and I found my voice by standing up to those who thought they could strip me further. Finding our voice is a gift. The journey of healing is a personal one for each man and woman and not to be judged. It took me a long time to "find my voice."
I am thankful for my journey as my past assists me in my writing, advocacy, and gives me a unique overview of the dynamics of the world around me. My collapse in 1993 was from decades of abuse and cruelty, but mostly because my voice and identity had been stripped away at a young age. My voice was removed before it could ever "form." "If our lips don’t speak it; our bodies will scream it.” - Clarissa Estes, Ph.D.
In her book, Trauma and Recovery, Judith Herman writes, “It is very tempting to take the side of the perpetrator. All the perpetrator asks is that the bystander do nothing. He appeals to the universal desire to see, hear, and speak no evil. The victim, on the contrary, asks the bystander to share the burden of the pain. The victim demands action, engagement, and remembering...“In order to escape accountability for his crimes, the perpetrator does everything in his power to promote forgetting. Secrecy and silence are the perpetrator's first line of defense. If secrecy fails, the perpetrator attacks the credibility of his victim. If he cannot silence her absolutely, he tries to make sure that no one listens. To this end, he marshals an impressive array of arguments, from the most blatant denial to the most sophisticated and elegant rationalization.
"After every atrocity one can expect to hear the same predictable apologies: it never happened; the victim lies; the victim exaggerates; the victim brought it on herself; and in any case it is time to forget the past and move on. The more powerful the perpetrator, the greater is his prerogative to name and define reality, and the more completely his arguments prevail.
"The perpetrator's arguments prove irresistible when the bystander faces them in isolation. Without a supportive social environment, the bystander usually succumbs to the temptation to look the other way. This is true even when the victim is an idealized and valued member of society. Soldiers in every war, even those who have been regarded as heroes, complain bitterly that no one wants to know the real truth about war. When the victim is already devalued (a woman, a child), she may find that the most traumatic events in her life take place outside the realm of socially validated reality. Her experience becomes unspeakable. . . .
“To hold traumatic reality in consciousness requires a social context that affirms and protects the victim and that joins the victim and witness in a common alliance. For the individual victim, this social context is created by relationships with friends, lovers, and family. For the larger society, the social context is created by political movements that give voice to the disempowered. . . .”
After years of abuse and court trauma, and now more violence, betrayal and therapist exploitation, I identify with the character of the Vietnamese woman portrayed in the movie, 'Casualties of War' starring Michael Fox and Sean Penn. A group of American soldiers invades a Vietnamese village and capture a young woman. They gang rape her and force her to march with them on their patrol. When they were 'finished with her,' they shot her and threw her over an embankment. Dr. Kuttner's betrayal of me, dismissing my pleas for help regarding his associate, Mr Amiotte, then becoming annoyed with me when I reported I was being threatened, financially exploited and abused by Mr. Amiotte in 1999, has caused me much reflection. I came to the conclusion that Dr. Kuttner is my worse memory in my life history of abuse. He may never understand that truth, but those who are aware, awake and conscious understand what I am saying is true. There would not have been any professional consequences to Dr. Charles H. Kuttner had I been murdered. I would have only been a 'statistic.'